It wasn't until I arrived at the coffee shop that I figured out what was going on. I was just down and I couldn't make it go away. Then I sat down with my coffee and had to fight the tears. Even now I'm not fully convinced this is what I think it is.
Roomie is in escrow. She will be moving out, probably at the end of May. Her moving out does not bother me. The fact that I have no one else to move in, a roach problem, and not enough income to pay for the place myself- this bothers me.
It's so hard not to say, "If Becki were coming home..." She was going to. The timing would have been perfect, for she returns June 4th, but this is only for the summer, not permanently.
I'm scared. I don't know how this will work. I'm out of roommate options, and the roaches make it ridiculous to get a roommate anyway.
I don't know. There may be more to this sadness, but sadness it is. I think I need a nap today. And a good cry.
Roomie is in escrow. She will be moving out, probably at the end of May. Her moving out does not bother me. The fact that I have no one else to move in, a roach problem, and not enough income to pay for the place myself- this bothers me.
It's so hard not to say, "If Becki were coming home..." She was going to. The timing would have been perfect, for she returns June 4th, but this is only for the summer, not permanently.
I'm scared. I don't know how this will work. I'm out of roommate options, and the roaches make it ridiculous to get a roommate anyway.
I don't know. There may be more to this sadness, but sadness it is. I think I need a nap today. And a good cry.
posted by The Other Gatekeeper at
12:15 PM
2 Comments:
Sometimes, taking an antidepressant will make room for tears and sadness that are for good cause.
You're under a lot of pressure. It's okay to cry. If the antidepressant is working, you will cry for a while and then the tears will be done.
You're still in transition, remember.
Be kind to spidey for me.
What he said. Moi aussi!
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