Better This Time
It was spring 2006 when I took Chinese at a local community college. It was rather upsetting to me. I had a degree. Going back to Community College seemed a bit insulting. It did not help that the Cal State Uni campus I had attempted to go to grad school at had turned me down over a GPA discrepancy of .05. That sucked.
Well, I just filled out the online application for that very same community college. I am turning into the perpetual student, it would seem. This time, though, I have a clearly defined purpose. I will take a class for three semesters, then I will head off to grad school. Again.
Yes, I know I keep saying that. Yes, I know this will be my third shot at grad school. Yes, I know no one reading this is making the comments- they're in my own mind. I'm answering because I need to. This time I will get it right. This time I will investigate and prepare. This time the monsters in my head will not win, because when I want something like this bad enough, I fight for it, and when I fight, I win.
This spring, then, my GPA enhancing and brain training class of choice will be German. I took German once, but it was my first year of college. I was 18. I remember some, but not much. Now I get to have another go at it, and this time it will be more than just for fun. The grad program requires proficiency in either German or French. Whee!
German or French. Of course, this being me, that "or" is daring me. This is something I have to make a decision on at some point. The program itself is Russian, and I am very seriously considering doubling it with Chinese, because I can't choose between them. So I'm already looking at tackling three languages at once. Changing the "or" to "and" will make it four. Granted, I have more years of French than any other foreign language, and German is the one I've always wanted. What a conundrum. Ha. It would be just like me, though, to go for it. No one who knows me would be the least bit surprised.
I'm noticing a shift in me from last week. I am not paralyzed today by the hugeness of the idea. I know I can do hard things. Look at the last four years of my life! I said on Sunday that I'm not afraid, and now the irony has worn off. It's true today. Tomorrow, who knows, but today, I am not afraid.
Well, I just filled out the online application for that very same community college. I am turning into the perpetual student, it would seem. This time, though, I have a clearly defined purpose. I will take a class for three semesters, then I will head off to grad school. Again.
Yes, I know I keep saying that. Yes, I know this will be my third shot at grad school. Yes, I know no one reading this is making the comments- they're in my own mind. I'm answering because I need to. This time I will get it right. This time I will investigate and prepare. This time the monsters in my head will not win, because when I want something like this bad enough, I fight for it, and when I fight, I win.
This spring, then, my GPA enhancing and brain training class of choice will be German. I took German once, but it was my first year of college. I was 18. I remember some, but not much. Now I get to have another go at it, and this time it will be more than just for fun. The grad program requires proficiency in either German or French. Whee!
German or French. Of course, this being me, that "or" is daring me. This is something I have to make a decision on at some point. The program itself is Russian, and I am very seriously considering doubling it with Chinese, because I can't choose between them. So I'm already looking at tackling three languages at once. Changing the "or" to "and" will make it four. Granted, I have more years of French than any other foreign language, and German is the one I've always wanted. What a conundrum. Ha. It would be just like me, though, to go for it. No one who knows me would be the least bit surprised.
I'm noticing a shift in me from last week. I am not paralyzed today by the hugeness of the idea. I know I can do hard things. Look at the last four years of my life! I said on Sunday that I'm not afraid, and now the irony has worn off. It's true today. Tomorrow, who knows, but today, I am not afraid.
posted by Sam Gamgee at
11:53 AM
1 Comments:
... today, I am not afraid.
Praise God!
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